Overstimulation

Overstimulation is affecting my life for the past few weeks, or maybe months at least. Time flies by and I don’t notice it. I do the same things, things that I like and still like, but all seems gray. I’m letting these distractions control my perception of time.

Maybe it is still the phone? Maybe. It always has an allotment for mobile data. Why do I need to have an always-on access to the internet wherever I am? What am I afraid of missing about that I need instant access? Now that I’m pondering, there’s no strong reason. So, yet again, I switched mobile carriers and opted for the one that somehow have a mission I care for, and will only avail data allocation when truly needed. Most people that I observed are always on a video call with someone wherever and whenever they are. Anyone has a reason but, always being reachable is not for me.

I did have a phase of constantly switching Linux distributions on machines yet again. I don’t know. I still have this itch after all these yearsu. But yet again, I did settled on Debian, as always. I’ve been sailing on Debian for months now and I am starting to lose interest in chasing the shiny new stuff. It’s always been peaceful in this side.

The same is the case for my phones. I do love to tinker, but as of now, I feel like I’m wasting my time on some areas. Since I still do participate in society, I decided to have two phones, the main one which ironically I always root and have some modifications still and a secondary spyware phone which all have the proprietary bits for the proprietary apps like banks to operate. The secondary one is stationary and only pulled out when I need to participate to this modern world. The main phone is being tinkered often but, since the software are all free and opensource and I haven’t sideloaded Google apps and services, it is a joy to use. I remember the Android Froyo days when I started flashing custom ROMs, fun times. Now that Android is going to being a lockdown platform, I hope the initiatives to stop it succeed. We don’t have any viable OS alternative yet if these somewhat open Android platform became closed.

I don’t know where I am going with this, I just wrote this sitting on some random building staircase while taking a break on my bike ride. Is this me hinting myself to finally wake up?